‘Reel’ Life

"Percy Jackson & the Olympians: The Lightning Thief"

Way before Batman and Spidey donned their studly suits of spandex, ancient Greece had its own pantheon of comic book characters. Except those characters were gods, and their ‘superpowers’ varied from Zeus’ awesome lightening bolt to Hermes’ messenger duties.
So, the movie starts with the premise that these gods are still alive and well and still ruling the world as ineptly as ever. We’re introduced to Poseidon and Zeus, where we discover that Zeus is all bent out of shape because someone stole his lightening bolt.
You’d think that the most powerful god would keep his most powerful weapon someplace more secure, but hey, even the gods overlook things from time to time.
Zeus thinks Poseidon’s son stole it, and threatens war if it is not returned by the Summer Solstice, which naturally, is only a couple of weeks away.
Enter Percy Jackson. An average teenager, who hates high school because he has ADHD and dyslexia. He’s really only happy when he’s underwater – usually for several minutes at a time.
Come to find out, Percy is actually the demi-god son of Poseidon. Even better, Percy’s best friend is actually a satyr. He soon makes friends with Annabeth, the appropriately fierce daughter of Athena.
Ok, I’m a sucker for Greek mythology (always have been), so the movie didn’t have to work very hard to hold my attention.
The movie does a good job of catering to its target audience – adolescents.
It was serious without being too heavy, humorous without being too ridiculous...usually.
Still, at times it seemed the filmmakers were too distracted with their special effects to pay attention to logistics, and hoped that we would be too.
Well. Sorry. I have questions.
Like, how could three teenagers with no jobs afford to drive all over the United States?
How did they never get chased by the cops, especially once one of them had been declared missing?
How is Percy suddenly able to control all of his powers after one day of training?
Did Percy have any inkling of his powers, other than being able to hold his breath longer than the Navy Seals? Did he ever accidentally make the faucet explode when he was angry? Did he ever turn water into a trident and shoot it at his mother when she tried to make him take his vitamins?
What did Hermes use to fly before trendy basketball shoes started coming with a “wings-on” option?
Why is the entrance to Mt. Olympus, traditionally the highest mountain in Greece, located at the top of the Empire State Building?
And why, oh why, do the Greek gods who are now apparently based out of America speak English with a British accent? It probably isn’t out of the question to assume that gods could easily learn modern English, but then why any accent at all? They studied at Cambridge before relocating to NYC?
Kids watching will not notice, or care about those things, but they distracted me. Which is probably just as well, because there were a few cheesed out moments that I needed to be distracted from.
Still, it was, for the most part, entertaining. Logan Lerman plays the parts of angry teen and heroic youth equally well, and Uma Thurman plays Medusa as only she could.
I was even impressed that for once, instead of romanticizing the world of the gods, the film acknowledges what most Greek stories showcase those deities to be: spoiled children who do little but compete with each other and fulfill their own desires.
Maybe their kids will do better – or maybe not. Watch the film and you can decide.


Director: Chris Columbus
Writers: Rick Riordan (novel)
Craig Titley (screenplay)
Characters:
Percy Jackson – Logan Lermen
Grover – Brandon T. Jackson
Annabeth – Alexandra Daddario
Luke – Jake Abel
Zeus – Sean Bean
Mr. Brunner / Chiron – Pierce Brosnan
Hades – Steve Coogan
Persephone – Rosario Dawson
Athena – Melina Kanakaredes
Sally Jackson – Catherine Keener
Poseidon – Kevin McKidd
Medusa – Uma Thurman
Rating: PG for “action violence and peril, some scary images and suggestive material, and mild language.”